News
AlterEgo Gives Confidence Tips to Bliss Magazine Readers
1 August 2008
Teenage magazine, Bliss, has asked AlterEgo to provide their readers with tips on coming out of their shell for the September issue. We thought you might like to see them...
The good news is shyness is a habit that can be re-learnt. The bad news is that you have to put the work in to change the habit. But there are lots of things you can do. These are our top tips..
1. As well as being the main way we communicate with people, our body
language is also the main way we communicate with ourselves. If we walk
around with hunched up shoulders and stare at the floor, our body language
tells our brains to feel sad and insecure - because that's how you look when you're feeling sad and insecure. However, if you start to walk tall, put your shoulders back and keep your head held high, your body language will tell your brain that you are a confident person and it will start to affect the way you feel about yourself. Go on, try it! You might be amazed at how you start to feel.
2. Everyone can feel shy and insecure so you're not alone. When meeting people, take the focus off yourself by remembering that the person you're talking to is just as worried about not being liked or saying something silly as you are. Think of them as being shy when they're talking to you and try to help them feel more at ease by smiling and focusing on what they're saying.
3. Remember your self-worth. Everyone has a place in society - including you! What you have to say is just as valid as anyone else. Other people need you - they need your input, your questions and your insight. You're an interesting person!
4. Don't let a bad experience hold you back. We've all said something
embarrassing, silly or foolish. The good thing is that people are so
wrapped up in themselves that they forget about it very quickly. So think
of your words like chip paper - yesterday's news and move on as soon as you can. And remember, if you have a bad encounter with someone, it's their issue and not yours. It could be that they've had a bad day or they could even be intimidated by you. If they're not nice, they're not worth knowing anyway.
5. Be honest. If you find yourself feeling shy in front of people, then
tell them if you can. This will help the other person to understand how you're feeling and to help you feel more at ease. Don't drink to feel more confident as this can lead to bigger issues in the morning and is a
dangerous habit to start.
6. Think positively - not only about yourself but the situation!
Learning the skills of being more confident can open so many doors - new
friends, new opportunities and better career prospects - so start to see
social situations in a new and exciting light. Help yourself by getting rid of negative thoughts - you can practise this by imagining a volume control in your head. When you hear yourself thinking negative things, imagine the volume control being turned down and then off. Each time you hear negative thoughts, replace them with the opposite positive one. This takes practice but it's vital that you start to think positively.
7. Feel the fear and do it anyway. Fear and excitement are the same
feeling. So if you begin to feel a bit anxious, imagine that it's
excitement. Go into social settings remembering the tips above and you'll
be fine.
8. If you've tried everything, practised the tips above as many times as
you can and nothing seems to be working, you might want to consider
hypnotherapy. Hypnotherapy can help reach your subconscious which is the
area of your brain that controls your behaviour. This can help speed up
the process and can be extremely useful for extreme confidence issues.
For more information, please contact us here or call 0845 050 7922.